Spirits and Weeds

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Falling for You

I loved you because when I was sick you would tuck the sheets around me, pull the covers up near my ears so no more bad germs could get into my body and you would kiss my forehead as I drifted off to sleep. When I woke up, you were right there next to me waiting with warm chicken noodle soup with ice cubes floating around the broth to cool it down so I wouldn’t burn my tongue but I always did. You would just laugh and say ” I told you to wait”. But I never wanted to. I never wanted to wait for anything so I jumped the lines at the fair so I could be the first one in line for the roller coaster to sit in the first car and feel myself swallow my screams as the cars flew around up and down and in circles. Over and over again. I rode it all day and you would tell me you were too tired and begged me to go home when the sun sank but I couldn’t hear you because my smile was so big it blocked my ears. Mom said that there were going to be days where I wouldn’t want to smile but she is wrong because I can’t think of a day where I wouldn’t want to smile or where I would want to cry because if I cry then those sad times would surface and I can’t think about those because that would mean I would have to dig up that box I buried years ago. I said I loved you and I meant it. So did you? I loved you because when I dyed my hair orange, you said it looked nice even thought your mouth was still gaping from the shock when you first walked into the kitchen and saw me. I tried to sit in the sunlight to make it look better than it actually was. I thought if I made a change it would make you notice me more, to “change things up” because I thought you were tired of me after being with me for 10 years. You smiled though, and kissed me like it was the first time and said ” I like your new look”. That is when I realized you were never bored of me but found me constantly entertaining. I loved you because when I thought things were bad I would come home and there you were with roses in your hand and placed in every room of our house. You said it was because you couldn’t stop thinking about me and when I told you I missed you, you would rush home and hold me for as long as it took for the sadness I felt to leave my body. After, we would sit barefoot on the pantry floor eating whatever we could find in there because you knew it would make me smile. And I would laugh, with chocolate at the corners of my mouth and you wouldn’t say anything but just kiss me until my cheeks hurt. Your’s would be pink because every time you kissed me would blush. After ten years I was still falling for you. .